Ingredients of True Relationship

My mind was literally desperate to write on this topic seeing today’s era forgetting the true essence of LOVE. On one or the other day you see that celebrities are separated after so many years of love, other way you see the extra marital affairs, next you also see feeling suddenly transfer to other person. Why the LOVE has become so weak? Why that strength is not there to heal and trust each other? Why we move to another partner? Why getting divorced after kids? These kinda LOVE is hurting me and breaking me from inside.

So, I am pointing here some psychological facts which might help us to heal our relations. First of all our life is too small to break and get again the new one. If you are having that “ONE” which you feel soulful connection than never leave them because some day we are surely gonna miss that “ONE” when we are apart. Value “Human” and not the “Materiality of them”. Nobody is perfect and nobody’s relation is perfect we just have to put those ingredients in our “Relation Recipe” that it becomes perfect day by day.

 

I am pointing here my Personal Counseling experience which my clients usually have.

1. It was one day somebody came and started crying in front of me told that “I love my partner a lot but he has extra marital affair. We did love marriage and after having kid how can he love other? How feelings change? “

My answer was to both of them: 1^st of all after some years of a relation due to responsibilities, issues, little fights, lack of communication, family pressure etc will fade the relation. As we are humans, we need something new each day. So do add some flavors like Garam Masala, Mayonnaise, some sweetness and whatever is liked by you and your partner. Try new each day. As the era is growing, we even must help and update each other to survive. No matter what the situation becomes. You decided you loved and if it is true that love never gets transferred. But because we forget that love is a recipe which should be cooked with focus. 1^st be friends understand each other’s needs and then try to fulfil it.

2. Once my friend came running that my boyfriend is so possessive that if even, I talk to a boy he starts inquiring and just yells at me. I am so frustrated of him But I do not want to give up on him.

My give away to her was he is boy he knows how the world outside is, he has experienced his friends playing with girls so he just wants you to be safe and protected and dear really jealousy is the sign someone loves you because in this busy and selfish world nobody has time to be jealous and keep a good watch on you.

3. The other day round me with my student were sitting with one client and I was teaching her how to manage the emotional mind. On that what happened was the girl came and started sharing that she had a physical relation with one boy after she got divorced from her forced marriage. She even did a miss carriage for 2 times. That boy is now not ready to accept her and she was I will take revenge and not let him leave peacefully. He has ruined my life.

Here I would like to point out 2 things, my student said that the girl was the issue, without confirmation she should not involve in physical relation but my view goes like she loved with all true heart and she surrendered herself to her man in innocence so that girl is not at fault. The other thing if you love someone do not take revenge because love is to give but sometimes it may or may not come the way you wanted. You gave 100% and now its that partners duty to prove love right. Sometimes the Bollywood Dialogue seems true “ Aapka pyaar jaata hai to use jaane do, agar wo lotke aaye to hi wo tumhara hai.” So forgive and pray to have peace.

If I mention all my experiences here it could be a book so something very beautiful to share with you .

What is LOVE?

When someone can speak and get original worst with you without having fear to loose their partner. Because we yell at whom we feel are close otherwise we are very good with the people who are just so-called relatives and friends. We are scared to shout at them and loose the temper just because we have to save our personality or impression with them. But with whom we are really close we shout, we speak whatever comes in  mind, we are mad at them, we can do worst behavior with them, we beat them but if they are in true love will understand your mind and mood. Guys if you are having this special one. Just save that person because “iss ZAALIM DUNIYA mein wahi to hai apna.”

Check these ingredients, it will help you to save relation and will help you to build it strong.

·  Just love the worst part of your spouse because good is loved by all.

·  Understand what they are saying, it is not always what you think is right.

·  If you trust your partner, just trust blindly because doubt will create mountains. If you feel insecure just ask for clarification. And partner it is your duty to make him/her safe.

·  Do not put them on fault because we are always not right. Each coin has two sides.

·  Give second chance, because it is stronger than you have ever thought.

·  Respect his/her family and friends.

     Do not compare your partner with other. All have different tendency.

·  Stop checking on them because if they love you they will show the world how proud they are to have you.

·  If they are trying to confess something please listen with patience. Do not create mess just understand what and why your partner said you all the things truly. Mistakes are done unconsciously so forgive them and feel the beautiful relation.

·  Stand by them always no matter what the scenario is because they need you the most but, because of some circumstances they cannot tell.

·  Always express what you feel , “a two liner filled with emotions” is more important than lacs of rupees gift.

     Sometimes I do not know why feelings change ? But yes please focus on "your LOVE to whom you are committed", no matter how many comes and goes. Remember true one stays and there is immeasurable love. Forget societal norms, as at the end your parents will tell you have to spend rest of the life with your partner.

·  Respect the privacy of their friends. Your partner will tell you the truth if you do not overreact. But give time and be good to them also as they are waiting for you.

·   If your partner gives you the passwords means understand you are special. That does not mean to check constantly because it might leave gap between you and your spouse.

·  Small dose of happiness and madness are always welcomed. Do small small things each day which makes them feel happy and can remove all their tiredness. Understand him/her . We all are humans it happens.

·  See how much effort is put by your partner rather getting in the "Chakravyuh" of somebody's So-called good texts. Your partner will surely put you on TOP PRIORITY if they love you. Trust the process. Everything happens for good reason.

·  If your partner is taking risk respect that and value each moment.

·  Nobody knows what is going to be in next moment so make every moment special.

·  Say Sorry and end the fight. If your partner trusts you and is always waiting for you do not cheat them. Because you do not know how they can be broken from inside if you cheat, but because of love they will never complaint.

·  Do not let your partner down by your attitude, power or job because it is “love “, no age, money or anything can be barrier to love someone. Keep Ego aside and value the feelings. Teach each other and grow together.

·  Be Each Other’s Inspiration, you will not need any third to solve your problem. Because always third creates an issue and spoils the beautiful one.

Life is short. Keep it as simple as you can. Do not waste time in making relation complex. If you have loved just give your best manifest the best and feel the magic. This world have rare species which gives true love so value the presence.  As rightly said “The connections and relations are build in heaven. We just have to give our time to maintain it.”

Love to All and Pray to God to “Keep Your Relations Healthy.”